Yes! A million times yes! Someone else’s words…my heart connected…
I know you loved her.
If you didn’t, you wouldn’t have wanted to be with her. But since you’re only a human being with variable emotions, you might have been inclined to love her in all the wrong ways.
A healthy, happy relationship can transform into a destructive one if you treat her less than how she deserves to be treated.
Nonetheless, I hope you tried to love her right. I hope you cast every ray of awareness upon your love for her. I hope you know that awareness is what keeps a relationship strong.
I want you to remember how she looked when you first laid eyes on her. She was everything you longed for. Be it her beauty, her wild nature, her sense of humor or her independence, there was something about her you hadn’t found in anyone else.
And what floored you the most was her completeness.
If you loved her, you’d have wanted to keep her this way. Keep her beautiful, keep her wild, keep her complete.
While she’s the master of her own fate, I wish you understood that you played a major role in her life. How you treated her determined how she viewed herself—you could have made her shine but you made her feel lost. She was a statue in your hands and she only hoped to be held with vigilance.
If you loved her, don’t destroy her.
Know that she was destroyed before and another destruction wasn’t what she was aiming for. If she was with you, know that she had stepped over her fear and insecurities to be with you. She had stepped over her past and decided to give love another chance. She had entrusted you with the health of this relationship—and with her heart.
You let her down.
You destroy her the moment you think you know her. She’s not a book you will eventually finish. She was something yet to be discovered—so you should have lived every day as if you were meeting her for the first time.
Nothing destroyed her more than your emotional absence.
Know that you wrecked her when she felt you needed her rather than wanted her. You destroyed every inch of her when you only loved her when loneliness creeped up on you. Because she sought love in all moments, not just when your fears and insecurities strike.
I know that your own past sufferings may have destroyed you. But you can’t love her just so she can carry your emotional baggage with you. You can’t love her if you only want her to fix you. Know that she would have with time, without you even knowing.
Her love and existence could have healed every part of you. But you are with her solely to fill the emptiness inside you, she will know—and it will destroy her.
And remember, she didn’t want to be fixed either. Maybe she opened up to you and told you about her painful past. Perhaps you know the exact number of pieces she was turned into. But she didn’t tell you so you would fix her—she only told you so you could know what she endured and how it made her who she is today.
She wanted you to acknowledge that your actions toward her—actions motivated by love, understanding and patience—are what mattered.
Don’t treat her like a broken woman. She is complete with all her pieces, even though they may still be scattered everywhere. You could have Embraced them with her—instead you add to them. She went through destructive relationships in the past. She went through the “worst” so she could appreciate the “better”.
If you loved her, you should have loved her with all her flaws and insecurities. She is as imperfect as you are and she only hoped to share that imperfection. She wants to undress her soul and be utterly herself.
She wants to be the same way with the world that she is in the mirror—crazy, wild and free. You were not ready to accept her as she is, you destroy her.
If you loved her, you should have built her up because she would have been doing the same for you. Know that whatever effort you put in, she was putting in.
If you treated her right, she’d have loved more.
If you loved her well, she’d never forget.
If you loved her, let her go…don’t destroy her…let her go…please just let her go…